Emotional Quotient

“The problem with a rat race is that the winner of this race is always a rat”, the dialogue of the IIT-B movie deja-vu can make you to clap but it made me to write, after a long break(brake!).

Three incidents occurred simultaneously in this fortnight a person of Indian origin got the Nobel prize, David shepered died and I again started to use ”045 Reynolds fine carbure pen”.

Lets start with Deja-vu. The movie reflects the frustration of an IITian because he could not pass the exams, could not crack a job, and could not get a gal. Understandably it touches the sentiments of thousands of IITians (including me! Err…sorry not me, as I m not an IITian). The movie also tried to convey the message that the mind of an IITian dwells in the plastic region, only thing it needs is a little more stress and it can fate the ultimate break down called suicide by them and homicide by me. Two things are pretty clear from this movie:

i) IITians are incapable or incompetent to the level of stress imposed on them i.e IIT-JEE selection process is a crap.
ii) If not, the movie is based on the bastion of a particular guy and a publicity stunt
(as same as the novel FPS by chetan bhagat).
I am not giving the answer as I am a psuedo-iitian (phew!! New word-psuedo-iitian).


An Indian can declare noble physics prize winner ( I don’t remember his name..sorry) as arrogant because he had blocked all the emails sent to him by Indians. He further said,”leave me alone and let me work for science”. Again two things are clear:

i) Every NRI physics Nobel prize winner cant be C V RAMAN.
ii) We cant win a Nobel prize because the guys of our top most institutions IITs are frustrated (courtesy: movie deja –vu).
Here comes the emotional quotient! The almighty, truly rich, omni- magnimous Americans say EQ is inversely proportional to IQ….not agreed…here in INDIA both are at unprecedented low(don’t cry I m justifying myself with some examples):
i) NAXALITES : Their IQ is low(as always) but now they have transformed into ruthless contract killers (EQ has been negative)
ii) AMBANI BROTHERS: Their EQ was always low but now their IQ has also been belerantly blunt.
iii) BOLLYWOOD: what is yr rashee(/why are you watching).


Ok! Lets talk some business here. Americanisation of Indian economy, inconsistency in RBI policies, dipping desi SMEs, porous security issues, falling MIGs, colliding trains, postponing national games, blind disinvestments and frustrated IITians had pandemicised/ inculpated every Indian to race and race blindly, decimating our IQ and abdicating our EQ.

As only low IQ, dismal EQ rats are available in India no one can expect a cat race!! 3 cheers to rat race….?

FINAL Yr: SOCKS (SHOCKS) UP!!!!

I was late, either deliberately or casually, to register in ISM as a final yr student. At one side my heart was alarming me to an unprecedented, less predictable and discomforting 52-weeks while on the other the joyous beeping of being the seniormost (except MATKAS) was exciting me. Like always the negativity prevailed and I registered myself on the last date of scheduled registration.

Throughout the whole vacation I kept my one eye on the recovering world while my one ear on the fluctuating price of CRUDE OIL. I listened the Finance Budget for the first time in my life though I never understood even a single word except FISCAL DEPOSIT. Post Budget I was probably the single person congratulating the FM for spending 10 lakh crore on the earning of 6 lakh crore at a deficit of 6.8% of our GDP, sensex and industry responded negatively and I saw the imaginative FM singing a lullaby at the Parliament. But I derived one silver lining for me from these two budgets. I thought that if whole India heard, accepted and reacted the BANGLISH of Mukherjee & Banerjee combo then I see no reasons why the interviewers will not at least hear my HINGLISH (much better than BANGLISH) and this soothe my anxiety.

In this hurricari of emotions during my vacation, I decided to study for my placement. Somehow, I managed to study the first night and devoted myself to the first chapter of AMYX, but it gave my mom a spy on me, whether I got failed or something more problematic , on the day after I left my idea of preparation.

My future pivoted around the whole vacation that what should I do, I queried regarding CAT, UPSC, GRE and even GATE. Lastly I decided to toss my future head denoted for higher education . Tail came and my all problems were evaporated, now onwards, I have to smoke, drink and wait my future to happen. (Toss is a good idea if u r not certain what u have to do in future).

Finally, the day came when I have to step into the final yr world, on 11^th july 2009, train was late by 6 hrs but it didn’t spoil fever of finality. I took the rickshaw to enter in the premises of ISM, in which I am residing from almost 3 yrs, but this time I was feeling an anxiously unpleasant and sorrowfully disheartened. I was feeling that the T&P dept, admin block, main building and even upper ground were trying to say something, but either I was ignoring it or I was not so imaginative to respond. Though the roads of the student avenue were same but why I was feeling that if they were hampering my footsteps.

My chain of thoughts paused when rickshaw-man (better not to say rickshaw-puller) asked near EMERALD, “sir, is this your hostel?”, I blinked and pointed my finger ahead. I was feeling excited to see the advancements in “AMBER HOSTEL” but my eyes rolled over the board fastened affront of sport complex declaring that from now-onwards there will only be 5 hrs of a day in which it will remain open. I had a pity on the POLLY-GUYS, thinking from now-on where they will make their strategies and execute their plan-of-action, where they will drink and smoke the tensions post POLY and where they will observe the party to show their strength, but suddenly I found a better location, on the top PANI-TANKI , more secure, much airy and more statecraft. I found topaz hostel was gazing on me, I waved back and asked the man-on-the-front-seat-of-rickshaw to move on.

As I was still in my thought about the newly constructed and always closed squash court, I found myself on the DEHLI of SAPPHIRE HOSTEL. I interrogated the rickshaw-driver, “how the hell u knew that I am from this hostel”. He replied back instantly,” sir, as there is no hostel after this!!!”. I found whole ISM encircling around me, now I was feeling as if the T&P dept, main building, admin block and upper ground were saying, ”mano! Sock up for the surprises”.

Smoking : The elixir of lyf

This entire hullabaloo about smoking is so painful. The statutory warning on cigarette packets sets my heart afire. The frequency of inhalation increases to exhale the anger within. As if we smokers smoke merely for the sake of it. As if the world would been a better place if all of us stopped smoking once and for all. I exhort the smokers of the world to unite, as we have nothing to lose but our lungs. Only united can we ward off the prospects of a smokeless world. Only united can we plead our case, enlighten non-smokers and make them see the fire of service burning within us.

Has anyone wondered how our roads are made, our electricity lines put up, and our irrigation canals lay out? Its we, the unobtrusive social servants, who make this possible it’s we who choke our lungs with nicotine and provide revenue for the society to move. It’s we who knowingly and willingly die a slow death to make civilization live. While government across world are concerned about rising unemployment, we are the ones whose smoke sustains so many- tobacco cultivators, cigarette makers admen, dentists, cancer specialists….the number is legion.

I must concede, however, that we smokers have private ends to serve too. We inhale to fight pollution. Surprised!!! Well one needn’t be, for it is based on a simple medical philosophy. Aren’t we given weekend doses of viruses to make us immune to various diseases? The same belief governs us smokers. We inhale small amounts of tar, nicotine, carbon monoxide and what not to fight environmental pollution. Has anyone given a thought as to how our distaff staff sides have felt liberated had there been no smoke? Non-smokers seem to be patently anti-feminist. As the two genders smoke together, there mingling smoke rings signal the burning away of gender differences and their coming together. Enveloped in the smokescreens they have empowered to conquer the evil world. Peephole seeking a curb on smoking forget its importance in community life. The mere threat of losing the “hukka-pani” relationship has brought the mightiest to his knees. Non-smokers should become aware of our contribution to the world. Damned the definition of a cigar as a roll of tobacco with fire at one end and fool at the other. A generous fool should be more welcome than self centered wisdom…