12:35 am, Date 14th feb, only 3 things are visible, me, my 84mm elixir of life (ciggi offcourse), nd d beer of my choice ‘calsberg!’. I had kept my eyes on computer screen and my ears on my mobile ringtone, “dil to bachha hai jee”. Four consecutive years of college life and no valentine yet, ohh, my brain has rejected to breathe, I am going deep into my dream, dream of her, dream about her, dream for her, let me sleep, more sleep and sleep…..
3:55 am,14th feb, ashes all around, some mosquitoes are enjoying with their valentines amid the smokes (smokes of ma heart!), I checked my mobile, still no messages, re-inserted the SIM, put it on charge (I had charged it only hours before), WTF! I can’t recall anything, am I suffering from amnesia? No I CAN be fine, I am fine, I am an intelligent, smart and (now) settled boy of 21, but still no valentine….I cleared my throats and re-busied my status on gtalk( I usually keep my gtalk status as busy, to pretend and more importantly to convince myself that I am busy nd need no one to chat, share and flirt). Oh its past 4:30, now I should call her for the first (probably last ) time atleast, but she must be sleeping (how pretty she would be looking while sleeping), I must not disturb her, but what if I send her a message, yup that will be right, but what type of…no this one not it has something to do with friendship, I can’t be her friend! Ok, this one will be right, ‘happy V-day’ but what a cliché, wake up mano, u r going to b professional now……let d beer inside u to do the magic, oh where is the match-box???, I need a cigg to catalyse the beer. Ok! I should send her those 3 letters words “I love you”……fuck, I have no balance..yup I had only rs/-80 in my account which I invested in d beer…I should try wid my room-mate’s mobile but he has the network of smart…It will look cheap..koi nahi…let the sun rise, it is whole day still to go, today I will tell her that how much I love her, how much I need her, from tomorrow she will be mine, she should accept me(because I love her).
10:30 am, 14th feb, good morning, what is the score of India playing at eden gardens? Oh what am I asking!!..today is V-day valentine day for them and victory(/victim?) day for me, I will not brush, not eat…till she accepts me but I will bath, I had read in her orkut profile(personal) that she turns off body odour….i will pray to god too, yup I will read the whole ‘SUNDARKAAND’!! today is my day..but why I am reading for BAJRANAGBALI..? I should worship lord KRISHNA…oh I have no chants for him..so what? I will google it, yup here I go..the PDF is downloading, but this one is in English. I am a Brahmin….i can read Sanskrit..karmanye vadhikarste…….nainan chindanti shastrani….
1:30 am . 14th feb, Sunday, today there will be chicken-biryani in the mess, no, I m not going to eat till she accepts me, ohh how much she loves chicken, I will learn to cook chicken and will taste it by her hands!!okk, now I will call her, yup 09430898701 this should be her no…though I had not saved it, how can I, but I still remember it. Wow it is BSNL, mine has also BSNL…see how much our thoughts are alike, wait..what if it will not b her number…No, No..n I cant think beyond that, just dial….dialing…disconnected….whether she had changed her no, no…redial it…YOUR CALL CANT BE COMPLETED…oh BSNL is such a bullshit!!!! I should try with another network…smart will look cheap, shekhar..no he also has a BSNL and I cant go to other wing, I will feel uncomfortable, and also she may be taking her afternoon nap, she must be looking eternally beautiful while sleeping particularly on day time in the backdrop of sun I am looking at her gaped, astonished, amused…
6:00 pm, 14th feb, ohh shit, I was sleeping so late, its V-evening now, from last 3 yrs a had succumbed like that, I am such an asshole, no this tym I will not repeat that, I will tell her about my feeling no ifs nd buts, wait….what if she would reject, no…..no, her lips are wonderful they cant utter such harsh words!!! What if I will be in waiting, offcourse u will be in waiting, you owl, you have to try and try like anything,…what if she has a boyfriend!!!...holyshit, what a million dollar question it is, I had not even thought about it yet, my dream had never thought about it too….but my love is pious, for me love is worship, and it has got too much power man….she cant have a boyfriend, no possibility, no chance….yup I am dialing her no….dialing, dialing…its ringing…….its still ringing…..why she is not picking it up,…disconnected …let me dial again..redialing, what a beautiful concept this redialling is! Redial yr life, redial yr love, no..no love cant be redialled, even love cant be dialled…it happens….it can only be felt, sensed and worshipped!!...redialing..ya its ringing again…she had picked it up HELLO…oh what a sweet voice she had, distinguished, calm, how can i reply such a sweet voice with my rough and acrid one. HELLO! WHO’S THERE! Madam, I m calling from canara bank, do you have a look on our new credit card scheme, its bri…, NO! I DON’T NEED ANY CREDIT CARD, PLZZ DON’T WASTE MY TIME…madam just for a sec, this scheme is bri…disconnected..lliant!
that’s it, I am done! I cant talk to her!.....no mano , you have to call her again, for god sake u were waiting for this day for last 365*4 days……you cant be done, redial, just press the green button twice, ohhhh its redialling…ringing, “HEY Mr I TOLD U THAT I AM NOT INTERESTED IN ANY OF YOUR SCHEMES”, hey SNEHA, I am yr friend…we had studied together..a few odd years back..try to remember….put a lil stress on yr memory.. “WHO ARE YOU?”..just guess, simple and wild guess..
“OKK!! ASSIST ME TO GUESS YOU”….ofcourse…”FROM WHICH LETTER YOUR NAME STARTS WITH”
….m…..and “FROM WHICH LETTER IT ENDS WITH?” ….n… “HOW DO YOU LOOK”, ..thin, smart (exaggerating)….thin, tall (a bit)…thin…mmm…OK OK…. “DO YOU WEAR SPECS”….yes…”OH! HOW ARE YOU MOHAN!!!, IT HAS BEEN YEARS SINCE TALKING YOU”….shit she recognised me someone else, should I tell her my name, no its fortune, its destiny, its tym to say her goodbye!!!...bye sneha..bye…but how can I do this to me, no actually,….basically,….simply she did not even recognise me, I am not even in her memory(she must have a weak memory)……wait…just wait,… here is the silver lining….i did not use to wear specs when I studied in her class….then how on earth she could recognise me, should I call her again…no it will look awkward, a lot uncomfortable…better wait for 2011, and my KUNDALI also says that this yr is not gud for me…I hate 10,…nd 4 (2+0+1+1) is my lucky number too..i must wait for 14th feb 2011, and what’s new I would have get my no changed till then I will not take this BSNL again, its bullshit!!..no I will take BSNL..after all our thoughts have so much similarity…….but for now I need to eat badly..ohh my gosh!!!!! I have done a “V-day fast”….new concept na! western culture mixes with eastern one, “V-day+FAST”…what a thought!!...consolation…???
Monday, February 15, 2010
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)

